Live From 5 Minutes Ago

Saturday, October 04, 2003

Ah...the love poetry of George W. Bush:

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Oh my, lump in the bed
How I've missed you.
Roses are redder
Bluer am I
Seeing you kissed by that charming French guy.
The dogs and the cat, they missed you too
Barney's still mad you dropped him, he ate your shoe
The distance, my dear, has been such a barrier
Next time you want an adventure, just land on a carrier.

I don't know what's more distressing--the characterization of his wife as a "lump in the bed" or his characterization of Jacques Chirac as a "charming French Guy." For more details, as always, visit CNN here.

Doesn't really compare to the poetry of our last president, such as:

Let me begin with
The correct answer

I don't know for sure

But if you would like me
To give an educated guess
I will do that

But I do not know for sure.

(From Poetry Under Oath.)

Thursday, October 02, 2003

Scientists finally answer why the cookie crumbles. Aren't you thrilled? Get the details here.

Wednesday, October 01, 2003

Hope for America from Amazon's Top 100? You decide!

Weight Loss Books: 7
"Liberal" books: 5 (Franken, M. Moore, Ivins/Dubose, D. Corn, Hightower)
"Conservative" books: 6 (O'Reilly, D. Limbaugh, R. Shaw, Ingraham, G. Posner, A. Coulter)

So the truly unbeatable candidate in '04? Dr. Phil!

And don't forget Walter the Farting Dog--In at #82.

I thought the "dialogues" in my High School French textbook were lame. But Iraq has topped them in their primers:

Amal: "Come, Hassan, let us chant for the homeland and use our pens to write, `Our beloved Saddam.' "

Hassan: "I came, Amal. I came in a hurry to chant, `Oh, Saddam, our courageous president, we are all soldiers defending the borders for you, carrying weapons and marching to success.' "

Amal: "Let us start our work without delay."

And to think that I was bored by "Do you want to ride to the library on my moped?"

In a feeble effort to rescusitate my blog (which, for the past few months, would more aptly have been titled "Live From Several Months Ago"), time for some random thoughts.

1. "Lost in Translation" is almost as much of a treat as the critics make it out to be. I just found myself wishing that something would happen more concrete than what actually did. I wanted there to be more bang in the ending than just the (admittedly very nice) tracking shot of Bob's car driving away from the city. Great performances from Bill Murray and Scarlett Johanssen. And Anna Faris' wickedly nasty send-up of Cameron Diaz is priceless.

2. Did you watch the abomination known as "Coupling" last Thursday night on NBC? This is perhaps the best proof I've ever seen of the importance of acting to a series. Even though the script was word for word from the hysterical original British pilot ("Flushed"), the laughs were few and far between. Do yourself a favor and buy the BBC series one DVD's--watch those instead of NBC's version. You'll actually laugh. "Jane and the Truth Snake" is priceless, and lord knows what NBC is going to do with it. Yet somehow, it gets higher ratings than the genuinely charming "Miss Match," which winds up being a less annoying, more Vegan, and less anorexic variation on "Ally McBeal." Maybe what they ought to do is just retitle it "Law & Order: Matchmaker's Unit," and they'll have a huge hit, at least until CBS places "CSI: Peoria" up against it.

3. If you're a lawyer (like me) or a law student (like I used to be), there are two blogs you must visit daily. First, make sure to visit Patent Pending, where the "Incompetent Associate" ("IA") tells the tales of his travails as a young associate in a major IP firm. Second is Howard Bashman's wonderful How Appealing, the single best source for legal news on the web. Constantly updated, and with a sly sense of humor the sorts of which you're not going to find at Another blog well worth visiting is Adam Bonin's Throwing Things, if just in the hope that he will again use the phrase "Go Lessig on your ass."

4. The New Yorker is often scattershot, but this week's "Fall Books" issue is well worth the time and the $4.95. In particular, make sure to read the slightly disturbing piece on the "Chicken Soup for the Soul" empire and Louis Menand's bittersweet tribute to the Chicago Manual of Style.

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